Pornography is more accessible than ever
I was talking to my wife this week. We got onto the topic of pornography. We were talking about how we would protect our kids from it. Our culture used to have a stigma around the topic of pornography. If you watched it you were dirty, you could only get it by going to “that” video store. Or you had to go to the gas station and look the nice little old lady in the eye and ask for the dirty magazine that was wrapped in thick layers of plastic so that no innocent eyes could see it, all but announcing that you were a pervert. Unfortunately, times have changed. Now, pornography is more accessible than it has ever been. Not only can you look for it easily on the internet, but it gets delivered to you whether you want it or not with pop-up ads, and spam email.
Real conversations
The problem that we face is that the culture is changing faster than we can build up the courage to have direct and real conversations about it. Today, the most celebrated tv shows are full of nudity and sex. No longer is the marriage bed sacred but shows for the last decade or more have celebrated sex as just another thing that humans do, and it can be shared with anyone whom you choose. This breaks my heart. The culture has no idea anymore of the glorious wonder and safety of monogamy inside marriage. I say all of these things to encourage you to have those hard conversations with your kids. Let me give you some biblical wisdom for those conversations:
- Sex is a good thing that God created for enjoyment inside of marriage. Try not to paint sex out to be taboo. That might make your kids hide their struggles from you. Just remember it is the context for sex that is important. Be upfront with your kids, inform them of the dangers of pornography, read some articles, read some books, become well informed and then have that talk.
- If your child is struggling with things they have seen it is no different than any other sin that they may struggle with. Help them in humility. If you immediately shame them or act as if they committed the unpardonable sin, then don’t expect them to come to you for help. Remember, you are a sinner saved by grace.
- Teach, teach, teach them the gospel! Jesus came to earth to save them from their sins. It is a fight to root out sin in them, and the fight lasts as long as they are alive here on earth. No sin is strong enough to separate them from God if they are repentant and desire to do what God calls them to do. This is found in the truth of the gospel and no where else.
- The goal for your child is salvation, not just behaviour modification. I know that you love your kids. Make sure they know that before, during, and after the conversations about this topic.
I hope that this is helpful to you as you lead your kids before the cross of Jesus Christ.
In Christ,
Pastor Jonathan Welch
